The freedom to be powerful

I LOVE being a millennial because we are bold enough to approach dead stereotypes without mercy. Almost every Nigerian girl can relate to the things I am about to say and if you pretend not to, oh well.

When we backtrack to growing up as girls, while paying attention to every instruction given, it feels as though girls were created to just make men comfortable and cuddle their egos.

“Sit like this, men are watching you”
“Why can’t you cook? Men don’t like women who can’t cook”
“You must be an excellent wife so that your man doesn’t cheat because men have no self control”
“You were raped? Why did you dress like that? Why did you pass that road? Don’t you know men…”

And my all time favorite

“Don’t buy a car as a single woman because it will drive men away” (No pun intended!)

Jara,
“Don’t get that PhD, it will drive men away”

If a man feels threatened by my achievements, HE IS NOT WORTHY OF ME. He DOES NOT deserve the privilege of a lifetime with me because his behavior is a reflection of his fragile ego that I will be stuck fanning for the rest of our lives, and that’s equivalent to jail time.

So it would be nice to raise men who are confident, men who are honorable, men who are powerful in thought, speech and action, men who are taught self control, men who do not grow up with an entitlement mentality like the world owes them something. Men who know how to cook and clean up after themselves. Men who say no to temptation and walk away, men who are positively influential in any circle, not men who always blame women for their mediocre and callous attitude.

You have the right and the freedom to be powerful to what ever degree God created you to be; without apologizing, without feeling sorry for the next person or wondering if you should tone it down a bit to not make anyone nervous.

Finally, maybe I should go ahead to buy a car, so that filtering through the likely eligible husband to be won’t be a herculean task.